11. Read 20 books which have been strongly recommended by friends: Redeeming Love

My friend Elyse recommended that I read Redeeming Love, a novel by Francine Rivers. This novel is based upon the book of Hosea and attempts to portray the redeeming love which God shows towards all of mankind. Rivers does this through the story of Sarah (or Angel as she is also known), a girl who at the age of 8 is sold into prostitution and remains there till the age of 18 or 19. Then she is rescued by the godly Michael Hosea who sweeps her off and marries her even though she despises him at this point. Throughout the book we see Sarah's walls break down and her heart soften, by the end of the book she is not the cold-hearted girl who hates the world and trusts no one in it. By the end she has come to know God, her heart softens and is utterly transformed and she falls completely in love with her husband.

Originally I was skeptical about reading this novel, it was a fiction novel which seemed to be based on a soppy love story. But the story is raw and real, and shows so accurately a lot of how the female mind is put together. You can totally relate, not to Angels position (as a prostitute), but often to Angel's heart. She has put up so many barriers but shows that there is great strength to be found in vulnerability. She shows the beauty that is found in a loving heart and the great beauty which is discovered in simplicity. This is an incredible book for girls and young women everywhere who can see God's love through example and see how it is intended to be. It may even be a good read for guys too, Michael Hosea appears as a really godly guy. I am not by any means saying "every man should be Michael Hosea. He is apparently gorgeous, and loves God, read this men and follow his example", I am not saying this at all. But I am saying I think this book is a good insight for men and women and there are things within it that could really teach someone a lesson or give someone something to think about, from at least one part of the book. Not only will you learn about your own gender but will get a little insight into the other.

This was such a great read and I would definitely recommend this book. Don't just read a section of it because you will not get the full effect of what the book intends to teach. how the reader contrasts the character of Angel at the start and how she develops into Sarah at the end is utterly breathtaking. She sets a great example of how transforming the love of God is and how it can work, it teaches Christians that they should be showing this transforming love to others and although Angel does not get up at the end of the book and preach a sermon, what she preaches through her actions and character through the entire book is one of the most effective ways in which to show the amazing freedom that comes through letting your guard down and letting people truly come in. I know I have certainly learned a lot from it, in terms of human character, female character, relationships, marriage, human trafficking and the terrible effects of it, psychological effects of events and God too. It has shown me that I myself have put up barriers in my life and there is a quote in this when Miriam says to Angel that we sometimes hurt ourselves more whenever we are trying to protect ourselves from being hurt than we actually do if we are hurt directly. Sometimes when we think that we are playing it safe we really aren't at all. The way to truly guard your heart is not by putting up walls but by making sure that your relationship with God is ultimately the highest relationship and the biggest priority, if you are truly in love with Him nothing can hurt you. I have taken so much from this book that I did not expect and I could not be more thankful that someone recommended me it, it has honestly changed my thinking and I will ensure that I read once every few years so that I do not forget what it has taught me. Read this, honestly, I wouldn't recommend it if it wasn't worth it. Read this story of transformation and let it transform you, if only in a small way.

19 Before 20

Well this seems to be what I have come up with and starting from when I hit "publish" on this post...

1. Make a conscious effort to be yourself in absolutely every situation. And spend every day trying to find out who that person truly is.

2. Experiment more: whether this be in hair, clothes, movies, hobbies. Try something new every week.

3. Lose 20 pounds.

4. Spend 20 minutes a day reading your Bible.

5. Write something once a week which you don't have to.

6. Once a month get all dressed up and just go somewhere, anywhere.

7. Write a list of 20 things that you are thankful for each day.

8. Don't procrastinate. If something needs done, do it asap.

9. Run a 10k.

10. Discover which book of the Bible means the most to you and why.

11. Read 20 books which have been strongly recommended by friends.

12. Get American drivers license.

13. Fill a sketchbook.

14. Have a day utterly devoted to childhood before you kiss goodbye to your teenage years.

15. Spend one night under the stars.

16. Have a conversation with a new person every week.

17. Commit to praying for 20 big things to happen with a due date of 29th May.

18. Write more letters.

19. Spend 20 minutes a day just thinking (set list of things to think about each day).

These may not seem groundbreaking to you, but the effects of them could be...and GO.

Weirdly Encouraging

This is my Uncle Tot, after this picture was taken he looked at me and said "wow Vik, Im actually happy in this one, you should come hom emore often, you're like a ...Jesus Bear". It was probably one of the most weirdly encouraging things I have ever heard, love this guy so much. He is my Dad's youngest brother and I am the oldest grandchild so we kind of have this odd bond haha

SURPRISE

So I am back in Northern Ireland. After 2 flight cancellations, a 12 hour lay over, a 7 hour flight and a two hour drive I walked into to my house telling my Father to put the heating on (it was FREEZING) to which he stood shocked and then replied "you sneaky little..."...it was WONDERFUL. One thing you may not know about me is I love surprises and I love being the person people cannot guess. People rarely can pull one on me, but I have become quite the master. The entire day consisted of driving round to all my family and surprising them which was so cool. I had the tickets from October and thankfully no one here had ANY idea. Being home has been interesting, especially in the current social situation of Northern Ireland. If you are up to date with the BBC news then you will know that some members of the community are in uproar about a flag situation in Belfast, but this situation has opened an entire can of worms which Northern Ireland has buried instead of facing front on. Conflict is at a height and it has many of us praying that the troubles will not return to our small province. Frankly, the entire situation is, well, ridiculous.

The time has come that Northern Ireland needs to draw a line, and move on. This is so much easier said than done, and I understand that it will not just happen over night. So many people have lost people who they loved dearly in this fighting and I understand they will not want them to die for a lost cause, but we cannot let this behavior multiply again. Northern Ireland is suppose to be the place that will take the longest to recover from recession. Our tourism is going to plummet because the media are all over this and why would people see this as a nice place to go for a holiday? My generation is already becoming known as the generation to leave, with myself, I have friends who have left to America, Canada, New Zealand and Australia, among any others. This cannot go on any longer, in a conversation with my Dad he said its been the same ever since he was born...in 1970...that's 42 years of this. So many of us are just down right tired of this. There's no time for it anymore, there is no place for this bigotry in society any more. More people will leave, and if jobs even do come, there will be nobody to take them, recession will remain and Northern Ireland will be sorry for the day they took it too far yet again. Protestant and Catholic mean something totally different now and in a conversation with two of my closest friends we have decided to reply to the question "Are you Catholic or Protestant?" with "I'm neither...I'm a Christian" just because of the way in which our society has turned.

This trip will be filled with conversation about the current state of Northern Ireland and different views people hold, which are huge and there is such variety. But there comes a time and place when a line needs drawn and people need to work together and in this time and place this seems like a romantic fantasy.

Andy Stanley Kick...Actually Getting Round to It

      Last night myself and four other friends watched a movie. After the movie one of them went to bed and the rest of us sat up talking and it turned into a guys and girls panel. Those of us who were left were my friend Lisa, J.L, DJ and myself. Suddenly it had turned into them asking us questions and we would ask them some, though to be honest I let lisa ask them while I observed, most of them were circled around relationships and guy/girl interactions. Me and lisa had a lot of different answers on things which was great because it shows how different we all think and it provided various insights for the two boys. We sat up super late and I continued to think about it all even after everyone left. The entire conversation just really stirred up something in me and reminded me of a series which friends had recommended to me long ago, even though I only got through half of it then forgot. Today I watched all four sermons of the series of Andy Stanley's "The New Rules for love, Sex and Dating". And I am so happy I finished it and re-watched the ones I had already seen.

      Andy isn't going to provide you with deep theological insights but he will tell you the things you should know and the things which are often just taken as granted and so many don't communicate and have to learn the hard way. Andy's main motto in relation to dating and relationships is "become the person who you are looking for, is looking for". Not too groundbreaking but it makes a lot of sense. He also is known for giving the idea of setting aside one year in which to not allow yourself to date and to focus on becoming that person. When I watched half this series last year I decided to do this because, well, a lot of my friends had and it seemed like a good idea. A few months later I would start talking to a guy but that didn't work out and it was totally for the best on each of our parts. What I realized about many who took the challenge was that they were so focused upon trying not to date for a year that they forgot that they needed to be focused on becoming the person who the person they wanted to attract would be interested in. Suddenly the year would be over and they would begin yet another relationship which proved unsuccessful since they didn't focus on their own self during this time of not dating.

       Not I am not bashing Andy's recommendation. Not at all, in fact it has proved so valuable to so many people which he shows through the series. But I took a very different lesson from it. A lot of girls think that of they take the year off then they will suddenly meet their knight in shining armor at the other end, but yet they haven't spend the year really trying to deal with their own character and the person who they want to become and thus the person they want to attract. I realized through re-watching this series that I didn't need to take a year off because if I wasn't truly focusing on becoming a person who the person I am looking for is looking for then what is even the point? And also why was I taking a break from something I didn't even really start haha

The Most Important Lesson

The very last sermon did the most for me. Andy Stanley talked about the implication of everything which he talked about. 

         When you approach a relationship, its so important to guard your heart, you have heard this probably one million and one times, but how do we do this? We heard so much about it yet what have we been told in order to carry that out? First of all, look at Proverbs 14:15, "the simple believe anything but the prudent give thought to their steps", Andy recommends that rather than focusing on the promises which your dating partner, boyfriend/girlfriend gives, the past is always a better indicator than the promises that they will give you. We all have a past and we must forgive but pay attention to their traits, the things they continue to do over and over. 

        Heres 6 things which Andy recommended in his last sermon that we should pay special consideration to in regards to dating and marriage and the approach to take. 

   1. Address Unresolved Child Issues: 

            If you want to attempt to approach intimacy you need to approach it as a whole person. Don't believe what Andy describes as the "right person myth", don't think that when you meet the right person suddenly everything makes sense and works...because it wont. Anything from your past will creep up in your future but I will talk about this in another bit, so hold on there. This one is a bigee. 

   2. Ladies this one is for you 

          Do not dress like a commodity and do not tolerate a guy who treats you like one. If a guy dates you like one, he will marry you like one. Andy uses the analogy of a fisherman who will bait his hook depending on what he wants to catch and if you are fishing with your body, don't expect that the right guy will catch you. I really don;t like when girls say "gahh guys are all the same blah blah blah", eh false, all the guys you date are the same, all the guys who ask you out are the same, and what is the common denominator in all those relationships? yea...you...ouch. Ladies please just look inside yourselves, be the person who the person you want to attract is looking for. 

   3. Get out of debt. 

          You can get out quicker as a single than a married person. Small thing here but has huge effects. you don't want to create a trend by entering into a marriage with debt. 

    4. Marriage does not solve problems. 

           The good becomes better but the bad becomes worse. Try and break the bad habits before you even contemplate marriage and any guy or gal that says "oh but you'll be able to help me when we are married"..NO AND RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! You do not need to prop up your significant other, that is not your place at an early point in a relationship, and I know that sounds harsh but this is not just for your benefit but theirs too. They need to learn to rely on the right people or this could lead to further hurt later on. Everything gets more complicated when you get married. Andy claims that whatever the issues is that within 6 months of marriage, the spouses problem suddenly becomes YOUR fault. 

   5. Postpone the physical as long as possible. 

          Two world views. Women: want to know he is coming back. Men: thinking the physical didn't match up to his expectations, may end relationship prematurely because the physical didn't mean anything since they hadn't established an emotional relationship. You are looking for and deserve "the one"... not everyone. Andy suggests that you should put off the physical to the point where the other person wonders if you even think or are interested in that. Self control before marriage will encourage self control in marriage. Date someone with self control because again this past is a good indicator for the future. 

   6. Go to the right places to meet the right people. 

          Do things which support the way you want to live and you will meet the right people. This isn't something you should rely on but if you are looking for someone who will be on a similar path to you this is the best way. 

You can check out his series here : http://www.northpoint.org/messages/the-new-rules-for-love-sex-and-dating

Thee Best and Biggest Lesson I learned

I told you I would come back to this one. Ok so I said a bigee up there about dealing with unresolved child issues. This one was something that hit home for me, and Andy acknowledges that you cant just tell someone "yes ...your past...hmmm yea you should sort that out so you aren't considered as having baggage...unattractive much?"...It's big, so Andy directs you to a teaching called "Boy meets Girl" by Louie Giglio and let me tell you this is the single best sermon that I have ever heard. Its one hour long but is totally worth every second. 

WATCH THIS IF YOU LISTEN TO NOTHING I SAY EVER. 

http://www.passioncitychurch.com/watch/#PCC-040112-V1

So how do you deal with baggage; with having it, yet not bringing it round with you? He answers this. 

To describe this he uses a chest of 5 drawers to represent our "baggage". Each drawer represents different issues which could count as baggage. 

1. The first drawer...Generational Sin

        We are all born into sin. And in so many cases what caught up our parents will catch up on us, but so often we over-think this; we think that we are destined for the same fate as them, will suffer same problems and result as a copy. 

2. The second drawer...Abandonment. 

         Divorce, distance, disinterest, death. The treatment we received from our parents sticks with us. They can often make us feel abandoned. And you may always yearn for their acceptance even when they are long gone, and you seek it every day yet find it in no other individual. We either cling to others looking for this or we put up every wall imaginable and vow it will never happen again.

3. The third drawer... Enabling parents. 

          Some of us were given too many boundaries and others not enough. What does this show about our parents and how they loved us?

4. The fourth drawer... Performance based acceptance. 

          Some of us only heard I love you as a conditional statement or the beginning of a sentence rather than that being the entire sentence. 

5. The fifth drawer... Abuse 

          Whether this was sexual, physical, emotional, any form. You need to walk down that aisle or stand at the end of it knowing you trust the other. 

These five things encapsulate a lot of the baggage which people carry and so many people can relate to at least one of them. But healing can happen, through Christ miracles happen and although you may think that you just have to accept things the way they are, miracles happen and they happen through Jesus and the cross. Jesus took every one of these drawers on the cross, He understands. But know that although forgiveness to the people who did this to you seems hard, it is possible with Him. He forgave us, and we need to pass that on and who are we to judge and punish when these people are being punished by their own lives enough. 

When you make that decision to marry I hope that you are able to say "I do, and I am free". Through Christ we have a new DNA, we can make peach with the past and can enter the family of God as His child. We will still have the traits as our parents, both physically and similar character traits. Louie then took out all the drawers and built them into the shape of the cross, showing how Jesus took them and we need to give them to Him. If we carry them they never get solved. Stop looking into the past and deciding who you are but pick up your Bible and see the promises and notes of affection which your Almighty Father has written for you; that He loves you unconditionally, that He will neither leave nor forsake you, that He is yours and you are His, that you are new. He will always love and will never abandon. And He believes in you because He knows He can do earth-shattering and incredible things through you.

You have a new possibility, a new beginning. but this is only possible through Christ at the cross. 

Stop Stressing.

I need to focus less on where I will be, more on how I want to see things and the more on becoming the  person I want to be. I need to focus more on who I am rather than where I am. Because wherever I am I will always be me but if I am not all there in heart, am I really there at all? What do I want the words "Vikki Smyth" to mean to people? And what do I want that girl to look like? 

Our Expectations...

When I came across this, although it doesn't sound too ground-breakingly philosophical, it hit me a lot. I usually have two visions of my life. The romantic dream version of it all and the utterly sacrificial one. Sometimes in my head although I have certain dreams and desires I usually over ride them with things I think I should be doing. Its so easy to think that as Christians our most effective way to live is in a mud hut in Africa. We sometimes view ourselves too much as the servant or slave of God and forget that we are also His child. Its important that we remember both our child and servant identity but we must obtain a balance. And believe me this is something I am in training for. Sometimes I feel that in order to best serve the kingdom I need to sell all my possessions, move to a third world country, be in a good mood all the time, never get angry or sad (simply not christian) and live the single life and travel round like Paul himself. These are all great things, but when we do this we are coming up with a picture of what WE think GOD WANTS. 

This is something I have been battling with all semester and have asked a lot of friends about; 

Do we actually have a choice in it all or are we just ticking the boxes of the checklist that is our lives? 

Does the Spirit have something to say about everything, and if He doesn't speak on something should we take it as a no and just not act?

Is our only true command to follow the Great Commission and as long as we are doing that then we are all good?

I believe we have a freewill, and that God has given us longings and desires which He gave us for a reason. He didn't give us a freewill just so He could look over our shoulder the entire time and then be the first to say "wow...I told you so". And I don't believe He would have given us desires and longings just so He could dangle them above our heads. God wants us to live a full and joyful life, He doesn't want us to live in regret or bitterness. But I am not saying that God will give you everything you want, believe me I am so thankful that God has decided to hold a lot of things I thought I wanted from me. The difficult truth for us to swallow is that; God's plan for us is far better than the one we have for ourselves. God wants us to be free in Him, not bound by a life long To-Do list. HE gave you the crazy dreams you have, and as long as those dreams are set to glorify Him, then He was the one who granted you them. Its all about Him, I was asked the question recently; "If it was just you and Jesus on a desert Island would you be happy?", I want to grow in my faith to the point where I can say with full confidence "Yes" without even hesitating because if we are truly honest with ourselves thats a difficult question to answer. God wants to bless you, not just save it all. Allow Him to. 

Funny How Things Work Right?

So, my last post was about risks right? Well listen up folks. Just be careful what you pray for :)

Today I got accepted onto camp teams at my school. Basically what this consists of is that I will be traveling over the states this coming summer with a group of three other people and visiting camps all over the US. This has been one of my biggest dreams and a lot of prayer has went into it. Originally I was so scared to apply for this. I had been rejected last year for different reasons and wasn't going to apply this year until some friends convinced me into it. I was so scared to feel this rejection and failure again. But something felt right about reapplying this year. I am going to get the opportunity to tell hundred of kids this summer about Jesus, His love and how real He is in not just my life but how real He can be in these kids' lives too. This entire day I have been speechless by the fact I get this opportunity.

But as I thought about this dream, it suddenly dawned on me that every dream comes at a cost. This will mean not seeing my family or country for over a year. It will mean spending another birthday away from them, ending my teenage years 4,000 miles from the place I was born. But when I thought of this more, how selfish it was of me to think this way. To think that my dreams would cost me nothing. I have always been known as a dreamer, the person who wanted to change the world from such a young age, who didn't even see the sky as the limit when there was still space beyond it. My Dad would and still does always tell me that nothing good comes easy. When I think about the person who is my number one fan it is completely him. This summer I am going to do something which I know I am meant for, but something that scares me beyond belief. Like I referred to in my last post, this is the place where I reach the end of my faith and say "God you better show up" or when I sit as His feet and say "God...I don't know if I can, I don't know If I'm strong enough". The beauty of it is that I am not strong enough, but there is someone strong enough who has my back. This next year isn't going to be easy, fact, but I know its going to be worth it, that a year in the grand scheme of things isn't long at all.

I am so excited by this opportunity. I can just tell that this summer is going to be a life-changing one, not only will I witness the lives of kids being totally transformed by Christ but in turn this summer will completely change me too. I will be with a team all summer, friendships will be developed, we will love each other then get sick of each other and then love each other all the more, we will laugh, shout cry. In reality, I have NO idea what God has in store this summer. All I know is that He is in control and thats something I need to be content with.

I still will hold onto my big dreams, knowing that if I truly want to pursue them, the cost may be large but the cost will be totally worth it.

Wannabe Risk Taker

Do you ever hear a church sermon or a talk which you feel is totally directed at you? As each word is said you get more and more red because you think the speaker has actually been spying on you and is about to reveal who this entire analogy is about.

    God uses these a lot on me, not because I require His undivided attention but because I don't take hints very well and need to be told things up front. And recently one thing which God has been putting on my heart is risk taking. Its so easy to think that Christians are the people who play it safe. But if you're doing it right, you shouldn't be safe at all. To be in the center of God's will is the best place to be, but it's not the safest. God may call you to be at risk physically, spiritually, emotionally or all three. I don't know about you but the most terrifying one of these for me is the emotionally at risk option. I'd take smuggling Bibles or getting arrested over getting hurt emotionally or getting my heart wounded any day.

    BANG. And God got through. 

   From the surface I looked like I was living a risk. Moving 4,000 miles from everything I have ever known and studying something which I have no idea how it will fit in my life. But inside I was playing it totally safe emotionally, getting invested enough but not immersing myself. Soon I will be taking a lot of risks in my life, stuff which is coming up and ...Im petrified. But its about time, because you don't experience the fullness of life when you sit on the fence and watch everyone else live their lives radically for Christ and to the fullest.

    Taking risks isn't an unwise thing. Not in the slightest. Its essential to living a full life. Failure isn't in failing but in not trying. I would rather be the "well, I learned from that" rather than the "what if..." type of girl. I was told recently that we should get to a point in our call where we are at the feet of God saying "... I can't". CONVICTION. Our call everyday is to walk to the end of our faith and say "God...You better show up". Again, CONVICTION. So I guess I need to think about putting this on my 19 before 20 list? All I am sure of is that hurt is inevitable, failure is compulsory and all you can do is live and learn. It's time to start following the gut thats got me this far, and continue to laugh and smile through this beautiful story which I just have to be gutsy enough to live to the fullest.

God Appointments.

Like I said in a previous post I spent last week down in lexington at the world renowned Sawyer Household, home of John and Brenda. Like I have also mentioned, these visits always come at the most appropriate times or come as what I like to call "God appointments". Both John and Brenda have taught me things which I could rattle on about for ages. But one thing than always resinates with me is something John once told me in the summer.

John described spending time with God by imagining God in a giant armchair, maybe with a big cup of tea or coffee beside Him, but opposite Him sits another empty armchair. This one, is for you. Everyday God sits waiting for you to plonk down into the chair opposite Him, totally as you are. Whether thats telling Him about your incredible day; He gets excited when you're excited, He is proud of you and wants to share in those joys with you. He wants you to slam down into the chair and yell at Him, asking Him why nothing makes sense, why is He doing the things He is doing; He wants to be there in your anger, to let you know He doesn't love you any less. He wants you to fall into the chair, drained and exhausted, filled with emotion and crying your eyes out; so that He can comfort His child and tell them He will never leave them nor forsake them. Gods only desire...is that you sit in that chair. That you spend time with Him. Nothing hurts Him more when you only pop into that chair for a short time and are off again. He WANTS to spend time with YOU. How crazy of a thought is that?? It blows my mind that the creator of everything beautiful and extraordinary in this world wants to just spend time with me. 

But what stops us? Time? being "busy"? spending time with friends? homework, work? Stuff thats seems pretty lame in comparison to spending one on one time with the Creator. I'm guilty of it believe me, and this is as much for me as it is for you. Jon Weece, the senior pastor of Southland Christian Church in Lexington KY, claims that one of the best things he has chosen to do is take 10 minutes every morning and night to spend in utter silence. Within this time he just totally leaves it open for God to speak, one could say he jumps into the other arm chair for ten minutes every morning and night, in this time he also ponders who God is, what God means to him. Its a great way to start and end the day, to get the focus where it should be.

So I want to challenge you; go grab a coffee, tea, whatever you are into. Go to a coffee shop, your garden, or anywhere where you can escape for a while. Take your Bible, a prayer journal or anything. get this in order or just go as you are right now. God and jump in that other chair for a while. And talk to the Person who wants nothing more in this world than to spend time with you, no matter what state you are in.

Thanksgiving.

 So today was the beautiful day of Thanksgiving where we have the excuse to eat as much as physically necessary, watch football, and kill each other over crazy sales prices that evening. But this year I was challenged to write or think about what I was thankful for. I was challenged by John and Brenda Sawyer who I am thankful for in themselves because they have really poured into me this year, teaching me through their own personal example of how to seriously seek after God, the importance of His word and what a Godly marriage looks like. To be honest this semester has been a rough one, just in work load increasing and it also being the first time I was ever place the word "stressed" and my own name in the same sentence. But when I began to think about everything I was thankful for I was overwhelmed. I have been so incredibly blessed and instead of focusing upon that I have focused too much on what I should have at this point or things I need to achieve, rather than just being content in being the woman I was made to be. But here are some things I came up with:

1. I am thankful to be part of an incredible family.

         I come from a huge extended family, we are insane, crazy and just totally out there. We have every character from my Granny who makes thee most incredible sausage rolls and has the most incredible spirit which has impacted me beyond belief, my Granda the token quiet man but you know genuinely cares, my Papa the storyteller and where I get my traveling bug from and my Nana the one who after all these years driving is still mastering how to parallel park but her wicked sense of humor is where I have got a lot of mine from. We have my Aunt Nina in London whose determination and drive is so incredibly admirable, my Aunt Jacqueline's serving heart who consistently serves as a nurse to people who are often so unthankful in a huge hospital and my Aunt Paula who is one of the most welcoming people I know.
        Then we have the Uncles...and man are they a mad bunch. My Uncle Ged, the joker at every family occasion whose jokes originate from christmas crackers and Gavin and Stacey episodes. My Uncle Marty, also my Godfather, who even though he calls me "Doris"...still not sure why, I know I could turn to him for absolutely anything. My Uncle Po the technology mastermind who I have had some of my most interesting conversations with and who always brings something for me to the house when I'm home. And finally my Uncle Tot, the young one, who only recently told me he was proud of me and it means more to me than anything in the world. My five younger cousins mean the absolute world to me and I would do anything for those 5 boys.
       I would do anything for these people and although we are dysfunctional and imperfect, I love them more than anything in the world and will always stand by them. They have all molded me into the woman I am today and I know they will always continue to remain at my side.

...but now the immediate family...

         From the outside looking in we look pretty broken sometimes. But let me tell you about these incredible two men in my life. My Father, Paul Smyth, is my No. 1 fan. He will deny this but if there has ever been someone who has always believed in me, and in so many cases vastly more than I ever believed in myself, it has been him. One day this man's 15 year old daughter came in and said she wanted to go see a church in America, instead of insulting the sheer stupidity of such a statement, he bought her a plane ticket. I am a daddy's girl through and through and I can tell that this man has taught and shown me things which I will take to the grave with me. He has set an incredible example for me and has taught me that absolutely anything is possible just as long as you're willing to put the work in; Nothing good comes easy. I am thankful for a Mum who in the end just wanted to make her kids proud, and who I seem to become more like each day. A Mum who I know truly cared in the end, and I just hope I make her proud. She taught me how quick life can go but how beauty is in the small and simple things.

         My younger brother, George Smyth, is my ultimate partner in crime. George will turn 16 this December and I can honestly tell you that I look to this boy for advice sometimes. My Dad has no idea what is around the corner when we are both together, we have had the craziest adventures together and I cannot think of one time we have been together where we have not been laughing like crazy fools for the majority of the time. Sadly my Mum passed away when George was extremely young, so I mother George quite a bit, I can tell you that I am so proud of my brother and the man he is becoming. He sets a great example for younger boys who I know look up to him. 

         These two men are my absolute rocks. I know that whatever may happen in this life I will always have these two. And I know that any man that would ever try to pursue me would have to be a good one to get through these two. I am so incredibly thankful for my little family and for the huge support they give me, thy are my motivation, to make them proud. 

2. I am thankful to be part of an incredible school.
          Cincinnati Christian has been an incredible place where I have learned things and met people who have totally changed my life. This is not only my school but my home and within it lives my entire awesome and dysfunctional family which I found here. The family I have found there is incredible and the bond I have with people 4000 miles from my home amazes me everyday, I most definitely count so many of these people as family and the very thought of graduating in May 2015 and that being the last time I see them kills me.
          I am being poured into by my incredible mentor Mandy Smith who teaches me what it means to be a woman truly chasing after God. She is teaching me things which will stand by me throughout my entire career. I am being poured into by my professors who care so much more than your average university scholar. And every day I learn and am encouraged by the people around me, brothers and sisters in Christ.    

3. I am thankful for the rocks.
          There are people in my life who have always stood by me and been there right from the get go. My best friend formerly Caroline Brown and now Mrs. Rutledge led me to Christ, when everyone else didn't know what to do with me, she never gave up on me. Her persistence is what led me to Christ and I am eternally grateful for her and her caring heart which has grown even more since then. She taught me what true compassion looked like and how remain strong in faith.

          My girl Corinne Hodnett. The rock who can read me like no other person on this earth, she is one of the few who can see right through when I am trying to put up a front and is the first to call me  out. She has taught me how to preserver through anything, she is so much stronger than she gives herself credit and I could not be more excited that she moved to the States in August and now lives only an hour and a half away. Right now she is suggesting we get each other Christmas pajamas and give them to each other Christmas Eve...I could not be more excited and she knows me enough to know that.

          Ashley Tomlinson, I met this girl when I was seventeen when we realized that our Mothers died the same day and died of similar problems. Every year on that day we get together and just get away form everything. She is the big sister I never had. When she dropped me off for a leadership conference once she looked me right in the eye and said "Vikki...I'm proud of you", I sat in shock for ages, those few words just meant the world, the assurance in them was so overwhelming for me. Ashley has set a great example for me, her loving and encouraging nature is something which everyone notices from only being around her a short while. p.s this is the only picture of the both of us...it makes me love her even more.

         Bekah Balch, my kindred spirit and partner in crime, a total gem and bro who has my back. She takes a genuine concern and her servant and giving nature is to be admired. She has come through so much and has not let it hold her back. She continues to teach me so much in the everyday small things. This girl is going to do crazy things for the Lord and I am so excited to see it, she underestimates herself way too much for she is such a strong woman of Christ and has a genuine care for people.

These are only a few of my rocks. I have incredible friends which I truly believe God has put in my life and who I can completely rely on. I learn so much from these people in my life, those both in the states and back in beautiful northern ireland.

My lovely girls at Crosspoint, Dundrum

Fused teams 2011 and 2012

4. I am thankful for a love.
            I am thankful for a love from a heavenly Father that is unchanging. This love is not conditional, its unconditional and no matter what I do He wont love me any less. I will never truly understand this love and I have no chance of finding a love even close to it in this lifetime. He also has this crazy awesome plan for me that is way better than the one I have for myself, and I cannot wait to see it unfold because He has already amazed me so far.

These are a few of the things I am thankful for. I am so thankful I was challenged to do this, to think about it, because it just overwhelmed with me how blessed I truly am. But it pains me for the people who don;t have this or know this, and I feel it part of my call for people of whom I cross paths with to experience these things if only in the short time I meet them.    

 
         

19 before 20...

   

       So on May 29th I turn 20 years old. I know this is a significant time away but hear me out. I personally cannot believe this. 20 is the age where you thought you would have everything together at. But this is far from the case. I am only starting out on this crazy journey which God has me on. When I was younger I viewed turned 20 as a conclusion, when things would take form which would be evident for the rest of my life. In my case? I view 20 as more of a starting point than as a conclusion. Back in the day my Mother was engaged by 18, married 19, and had myself at 20. I am not working to her timeline. In relation to my Mother I am more of a Peter Pan like character who refuses to grow up until further notice.

     Anyway, before I turn 20 there are certain things I want to accomplish or that I want to get in the habit of before I kiss goodbye to my teenage years and enter the ten year countdown to 30...I know. Crazy. But I am struggling to think of things which would be totally class for me to do before I turn 20. I want to do things which will challenge me, things which will enrich my last months as a teenager and will pave a good path to begin my 20's. I want these 19 things to rock my world and have a heck of a lot of laughs along the way...

But I need help in thinking of 19 things...

This is where you come in...

I want to hear from YOU

19 things before 20... 

Lets hear them... 

vikki.smyth@ccuniversity.edu

The Classic Teachings on Love and Everything Lovely

At my Junior High retreat last weekend I learned so much about what young Junior Highers are facing here and it truly shocked me. I had totally forgotten was it was like to be that age but it seems that our youth are facing even more crazy stuff. As I sat with my high schoolers they began to tell me about school; about their lockers which get raided once a month for drugs, their bi-sexual friends who hold hands around school and their friends who are sleeping together, some of them even had thoughts of suicide. These kids aged from 11-13. I couldn't believe it. I love these kids so much and when they were saying all this I had to refrain from changing my major to education and starting up my own school to where I could lock them all away...or home-schooling them...that could work... But obviously with having a small group of 6th grad girls the topic of relationships came up. Some of them were "mature" and said they would wait to High School, which I immediately said still wasn't a good idea and said to wait to college...but then realized they were MY girls and I changed my mind to saying they couldn't date till they were 30. Which I still stand by. And will continue to stand by.

I came back to school, and realized that people nearly 7 years older than them still were thinking in a similar fashion about dating. They believed they were working to some sort of time frame. One thing I preached to my girls and I'll continue to, is never to settle and never to compromise, especially in relation to relationships. I see so many people do it and it breaks my heart.

Ladies,
        You deserve to walk down that aisle all in white and see the face drop of that dream man at the end. You deserve a guy who when he says "for better for worse" means it and more. You deserve a man who is a man. You deserve a guy who is totally and utterly head over heels for you in the purest form. You deserve the guy with the awesome faith who you don't think exists any more, but He does.

Men,
       You deserve that lady who walks down all in white, the girl who has saved herself just for you. You deserve a girl who wants your dreams and believes in them just as much as you. You deserve a girl who lights up every time she sees your face and makes you smile in return.


Guys and gals, if you don't promise me anything promise me you will never compromise and never settle. Don't give up your dreams, find someone who is just as excited, if not more, about the ones you have and someone who wants to be a part of them. Some people who are single get so mad at that but when you think about being single and why that is, just think that the reason you haven't met them yet is because God just isn't finished with them yet, but when they are, all the wait will be totally worth it. I promise.

Christianity Isn't Restricted.

I over-analyze my life to the max. I over think God's plan and think that in order for things to happen I need to be in specific places at specific times and do things in specific ways. This way of thinking often has us double checking every decision and rechecking it too, it makes us develop slow response times and honestly has us over thinking and doubting ourselves way too much. We often think that, as Christians, we need to follow a script which God has written and if we don't, then we are "off the path". But this idea of Christianity totally discredits the very thing which we are blessed to have...Freedom.

Now, its very true that God has a plan for our lives and we can often stray from that. But God made us with a freewill. God wanted us to freely choose to follow Him and gave us the command to love Him with all our heart, soul and mind and then to go into the world and make disciples. This is what He wants. I want to refrain from saying "this is the only thing He wants from us" because if you truly understand these commands and the implications of them then you will understand how big they are in themselves. You see to love God with all your heart , soul and mind means truly letting yourself and your desires die in order to pursue the desires He has for your life. If you aren't effected by this command, then you are simply not following it and don't understand it. I am not saying that I fully understand it, I am still learning to love with ALL my heart, ALL my soul and ALL my mind.

With ALL my heart...
       To put aside the desires of my heart and acknowledge that God will provide my every need and that He is enough...always.

With ALL my mind...
       To clear all the crap out of my brain and devote time to God so He can fill it with thoughts of Him and the ways He wants me to go.

With ALL my soul...
       To know that He saved me, He is the reason I am free and I have no other God than Him, no one will love me like Him...or even come close for that matter.

So from now, I choose to not focus on the details, God has those. I choose to live a free life, the life God intended for me, the life Jesus died so I could have. Don't think you have to follow a script, God has a crazy awesome plan for you. I promise. But the very things you look for will come when you stop looking. Instead of focusing on the details, focus on living a life of love, whole-heartedly devoted to the Lord in heart, soul and mind and go make disciples where you can, impact everyone you meet and I promise its a choice you never will regret. Let go, you aren't in control, you never were and guess what? ...you never will be. So the classic line of "Let go, Let God"comes into play. Live a life appropriate to your calling...and you are called to be free.

How Do We Remain Relevant?

Currently I'm staying down in Lexington with the Sawyers and yesterday, John shows me an article which argued for free contraception as opposed to abortion. Now the regular person who think that this article would appear pleasing to Christians because, well, there would be vast decrease in abortion which we Christians are always talking about. However, to this we would respond that it is actually the promiscuous behavior and the sexual intimacy outside of marriage which we are actually opposed to and that free contraception would only promote that behavior even more. You see, in neither situation would we be happy. To outside people, this seems insane, like we cannot be pleased.
               The view which we adopt in this situation is so counter-culture and is why we are criticized for being "out-dated" on our views. You see, only down this line of free contraception, will people see how sexual activity will increase. The age of beginning sexual activity will begin earlier, and this will have disastrous psychological effects on our youth as they experience one meaningless sexual relationship after another. But on the surface level of this article, unborn babies aren't dying because the women will have free contraception and this should surely please. But our problem with this issue goes right to the root. So how do we as Christians show people that our views are not outdated, that sexual relationships belong in a marriage, which according to modern day stats only 50% of marriages actually work out.
               John told me a John Wesley quote which states "what one generation tolerates, the next will embrace". He also led on to say that it will be my generation, our generation, who will deal with these big issues and we will have to show how the Bible still holds relevance and credibility within these situations. We have a huge case on our hands and we need to be prepared. We need to show how the Word is still alive and breathing and can hold relevance even in a culture which tells us it is everything but relevant.
               Dear Generation, we have a huge task ahead of us, and we cannot wait, it doesn't start whenever we have the degree in our hand, the spouse, the house and the 2.5 kids. It begins now, in our homes, in our schools, in our friendship circles.
               How do we show the Bible's relevance you may ask? Well believe me I asked myself the exact same question and this is what I came up with:

1. Actually read your Bible
             Its amazing how long we can go without reading our Bibles. Or how at ease we are at being   totally biblically illiterate. We should do more than merely read it, we should study it. You see, the evil doesn't want us to read it and will do anything to stop us from reading it. The Bible, at its basic, is God speaking to us, why would we not want to read and study it? We so often complain that God isn't directing us on some things, or showing clarity about things, and in so many of these situations turning to the Bible seems the very last thing we want to do.
            I get asked often how we decipher between the voice of good and the voice of evil within our heads. The good voice, God, works in the same way as scripture and if we don't know scripture we may have a hard time in telling which voice we should listen to. Ignorance of the gospel is ignorance of God himself and we should be weary of this.

2. Actually do what the Bible says
            Have you ever wondered how awesome Christianity would be if we actually read the Bible and did what it said? I think we would be unstoppable. So many people see back examples of Christians within our society and it's so sad. We should act in response to what we are studying in the Word, this is when we apply what we are studying. We study the Bible so we can act it out and be able to give people an accurate description of what we believe, and why we believe it.

These two actions are not groundbreaking but the effects of them could be...

The Old Cliche of "Finding Yourself"

                Let me tell you about teenager Vikki. Well I still am a teenager, but younger teenager Vikki. You could say that I knew I would go into ministry at around aged 16...but I did not want to. Not at all. I fought it unbelievably, trying to convince myself into attending art school which is what most people wanted for me. I had a talent there at least, the plan was that I would go and study ceramics, people could put their faith into that career for me.
                You see I was the kid who failed every public speaking assignment throughout high school and was the token person who people would be like "Vikki Smyth? who's that?". I had zero influence in these years so thinking that I could ever have any in the future could not even be imagined. The people around me were also skeptical about this thing I deemed a "calling". In my senior year I had to report to the careers staff about what my plans for college were, I told them that I would be going to America to attend Bible college to study ministry, I can remember the exact way they looked at me as they said "Well, Victoria, I really think you should have a plan B...this might only happen".
                Now, if you know me, at all, you will understand that I am pretty stubborn. To the point where it gets me in trouble all the time. I remember the day I finally told God, "OK, I don't get it... but I'll try it, there's nothing to lose and You always get your own way every time". I started my freshman year and as I started to surrender more, as God broke me more, as He rebuilt me, I began to see a change. Disclaimer: the breaking part, it wasn't nice, but it needed done. You see, I was built on a rocky foundation and the ground I was on was about to be pulled from under me.
                 But I came into my freshman year also holding a place the entire year at a University in Northern Ireland with the option of starting my second year there. I am so incredibly glad that I rejected that offer after my first year. I found a passion I didn't know that I had and I have gotten lost in it. I found the person I am meant to be and have an idea of the person I am striving to be.
                 I am not a finished work yet. And believe me, I still have a long way to go. But through all the hard times, I hold onto the hope that all of it has a purpose in this amazing plan that God has intrinsically designed, a life only I can live. And I could not be more excited about that.
               

Philippians 1:6 "And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ"

Friends.

I am incredibly blessed to be around such amazing people here at CCU. I want to try something new in this blog by introducing you to some of them. I am going to interview some of my friends here, introduce them to you and tell you a bit about how they got to CCU, where they've been and where they're going. You guys are seriously going to love getting to know them just like I have. I love stories and hearing the stories about the people I love are even cooler. I can't wait to introduce these incredible people to you and show you how knowing them is shaping my life.

Afraid to Fail

         A totally irrational fear I have is that of failure. I guess you could look into my past and see where this fear comes from but I believe that we both have a fear of this to a degree. I came across this quote the other day from Donald Miller who said "Afraid of failure? Fail at something five times fast. In doing so,  we learn failure is nothing to fear". The fear of failure is no doubt something which I personally need to get over and although I'm working towards throwing myself into failure (which I know, it sounds insane), I always go into it reluctantly. I remember the day I met my driving instructor back home, i turned to her and I said "ok, you need to throw me into stuff and I'm probably going to argue to shy away from it but you need to make me do it". I can tell you that this is a major theme amongst so many of my conversations with God.

                             "God, I don't want to go into ministry...I have nothing to offer"
                  "God, I can't go to America by myself... I'm only 15"
    "God, I don't know if I have the strength to leave the only place I know and move 4000 miles away"
                  "God, I can't put myself out there...they'll think I'm totally weird"
                             "God, I don't want to shoot for my dreams, because I'm just too scared they'll fall on their face...if it fails...hope is over...if i just avoid it...there is still hope"

                 In sure that in reading this you realized how ridiculous I am. But maybe you read it and realized that so many of these things you think yourself and now, in turn, you are realizing how ridiculous you are. Failure is something which no one likes. But, I'm sorry...its inevitable. I have struck out on many things in my nineteen years. Believe me. But have I ever regretted these failures?

not at all. 

                 You see although I shy away from them. My regrets, mistakes and failures have made me the wiser for them and taught me some incredible lessons along the way. I have learned that God's "no" is not a rejection, but a redirection. That certain relationships haven't worked out because God loves me way too much for me to be with someone who doesn't bring out the best in me or for me to bring out the best in them. That timing for God is His specialty and that the times where I couldn't be somewhere else that He had plans for me right where I was. That the people who I lost along the way made way for people who are impacting my life as we speak. You see, with hindsight, I see that every failure was a blessing. If I had done well in my science exams when I was 16, I'd be doing medicine or nursing...I wouldn't be here. If I had got on camp teams last summer...I would never have been able to stand beside my best friend as she married the love of her life. If that one relationship had worked out...I would've missed out on so much. With this in mind, I am ready to do life, make decisions, and if I fall...I pick myself up because my strength isn't about how many times I fall but how many times I pick myself up. 

"Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see" Hebrews 11:1 

"My flesh and heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever" Psalm 73:26 

The only regrets I have, are the times I was too scared to really chase for something, to try my hardest, and thats what I want to encourage you to do. If you fall, so what, I guarantee you pick yourself up being far more stronger than when you fell down. Its tough to be vulnerable, but sometimes it is when we are most vulnerable or weak that we give God the space to shine through. Reminding myself that if my dreams don't scare me...they are simply not big enough. 

A Kingdom Looking Church

So imagine you're sitting in your conservative, middle class church and suddenly an ex-convict walks in, all covered in tattoos and looking as intimidating as ever, you can already hear the elderly woman behind you fumble around for her purse and draw it closer, Mothers call over and embrace their children, Fathers stand back to the point where they feel like they look intimidating but one look and they'd be out the door. If you cannot imagine this and the hostility that would surround it then wow you are already in the kingdom mindset.
             I have to say, I would pay to see the reactions of my home church back in Northern Ireland as this character came in. In actual fact, this happened, it is happening. And more of it needs to happen. Sunday mornings are one of thee most segregated mornings in the world. For one morning on one day of the week for one hour, we lock ourselves in buildings, but all separate, by class, race, ethnicity and rarely do we go outside of them. But this is not the kingdom. What the kingdom will look like. You see the body of Christ is made up of all sorts of people and that is the very beauty of it, no one is excluded.

Our churches need to reflect that. 

            But so often we fall short. This church in New Zealand is specifically helping those who have just left prison. When I read this story, I was so amazingly encouraged, this is what we are about. This is what Christianity is about. And these are the stories where I say "wow! that is the Spirit of Jesus right there". But the thing is, that should not be my reaction, I should not be surprised at this nor should I find this any different than the faith I should see around me. You see this is not the ideal example, the winning example, this is what we should already be doing.
            How are we reflecting Jesus within our churches, do we really mean our "Everybody Welcome" which we put on our doors, or are we only welcoming to those who are just like us. I would say that if your church is selective about its congregation, then its not a church at all. Jesus wasn't selective about who He spoke to. He was ridiculed for who He spoke to. People looked down upon Him for eating with sinners, talking to prostitutes, being with those of lower social standing. But this never stopped Him.
            The Christian invite belongs to everyone, no matter what their past, their background, family, nothing matters, for we are equal when we stand before the cross. This article is one every church needs to read. Not as a "wow, look at them doing cool work" but as a "how are we accommodating various peoples?", if your church isn't diverse...it isn't accommodating...and that is the sorry truth. I hope this article both inspires but also helps you to see what we need more of in our churches and what the kingdom looks like.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-19153425

Ulster Rugby, The Ulster Men Standing Up

Irish Rugby lost a major asset to their sport in the form of Nevin Spence who sadly passed away along with his Brother and Father in an extremely unfortunate farming accident. The reason so many of the family died is because...they all tried to save each other. This story is one of deep tragedy, of such sorrow in both the Rugby and Northern Irish community.
                      I came across this article today in the BBC and it explains how faith has been used to comfort the ulster rugby team in trying to come to terms with the loss of their player Nevin. It appears that the captain and many of the Ulster players hold faith at high regard in their lives. At the Spence funeral, the brothers and father were described as "best friends" , and so many good words were spoken of them all. The faith of the family since this heart-breaking tragedy is most definitely something to be admired. Reading articles about the Spence family and seeing even in such a thing as the BBC about how much faith they had is incredible, and i know it must have been an honor for those who experienced the family in real life.
                     This story of love and faith makes me extremely proud to call myself Northern Irish, and makes me extremely proud of the people who live there. My thoughts and prayers are with the Spence family who have encountered such an extreme loss, but their steadfast faith through this is nothing short of completely admirable and inspirational. Stand Up For The Ulster Men. The Ulster Men who stood for their faith.

to see the article follow this link:  http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-19717485

Where does your joy come from?

This week I was challenged when one of my friends spoke at a student run chapel at my school. We were simply asked about joy, where our joy came from, or if we had any joy at all.
              We all seek acceptance, love and praise from those around us. Its inevitable and believe me I am the worst offender. I value the appraise of those around me rather than God's because, well, I have to live with the opinions of those around me. But we so often lose sight of who we are and who God intended us to be when we start beginning to focus more on the opinions around us. Again, I have been the worst offender. I could tell you the stories of how I would have changed so much about myself in order to suit the people around me. I changed my taste in fashion, in music, in how I act. Now I have come to the age where I want to be confident in who I am, what I like and where I want to go.
               To stay in God's will has something which has been hard for me. I am so independent to the point where it frustrates those closer to me. To depend and trust in someone I cannot see tests me beyond belief. I don't trust enough in the only thing I should be trusting in.
               I really want to challenge you...to challenge yourself. In reading your Bible, in your prayer life, pray big, pray specific, love on those around you, begin to start an epic journey of discovery of God and who you are in Him. So many people, really all people, need a good character analysis every now and again. The condition of the world is a direct reflection of the condition of the human heart and we all know that neither of these things are where they should be.
              This question: Where does your joy come from?
                         Think about it.
                                     Explore it.
                                                I know where mine should come from and I want to challenge you to explore it for myself. I know that my control of my life and the joy I think I am experiencing don't even come close to the joy I can find in Jesus Christ, if I just trust Him enough to handle it.

"I choose joy...I will refuse to see any problem as anything less than an opportunity to see God" - Max Lucado

Sneak Day 2012

So you guys are probably wondering what Sneak day is or if you follow me on twitter you are probably wondering what the heck I was tweeting about all day. Well once a year in the CCU calendar we have what we call Sneak Day. This event is predominately planned by Nu Delta Sigma who are the  Youth Ministry organization within our school for those interested in pursuing it. This year however, Nu Delta Sigma teamed up with Student Body Leadership, which I am blessed to be on this semester. Together we planned a day were all classes would be cancelled, events would be organized and the school (including professors) wouldn't know until the actual day itself. This day is CCU tradition so teachers know it will happen, just not when. 

8 am, Wednesday 12th September consisted of my friend Kasey and I running through the hallways of the girls dorm yelling "EVERYONE GET UP IT'S SNEAK DAY!"and myself playing, well screeching, my tin whistle. Most girls woke up startled by the occasion and others rather unimpressed by being awoken in such a way. Each floor was given a certain color, there were six teams in total so a girls floor and a guys floor would pair up with the same color. We were immediately all in competition with each other. We hurried everyone into the chapel for 8:30 where they could have breakfast before we started with worship. The worship was incredible, a great way to start the day. 

After worship we headed for activities which consisted of tug of war and dodgeball. These sports really promoted team spirit. People got so involved and it just really brought so many people together. After a picnic on the quad we all headed out for a service project into the city. We picked up trash all over area surrounding CCU, just showing that as Christians we are here to serve the people around us in whatever capacity that is. Sitting all together on the quad for dinner having ribs and listening to Jazz was such a cool way to just all join together (after we were all showered from sweating like crazy on the service project) and have some banter with each other. 

At 6:30pm we departed for Mount St Joe where we went to support our eagles soccer team! We all wanted to go to show our support to our boys and just get them psyched! Sadly we lost but they played the most incredible game and didn't go down without a fight! We did certainly show Mount St Joe how dedicated fans truly have to be! 

After a super long day we all returned to school to attend family. Here we had some worship music and then we all went outside for another CCU tradition called "lighting the hill". All the students stood in a huge circle outside our chapel, each with a candle, and we all lit each others. This was such a moving experience, we all stood, each with a candle. Mine went out a couple times but someone immediately beside me would always light mine up again. It just reminded me how blessed I am to have these people alongside me at this school. we all can keep each other on the right track and even if our lights are dim or they go out, you can be sure that someone will come along and relight it again. When we each had a candle, it was just so beautiful, to just see all the light that came from it. It was breathtaking. Just looking around it reminded me of how I am not alone. Not alone in chasing after Christ. One of the things which always astounds me about Christianity is that I can be 4000 miles from home and still be amongst family. The people of CCU I count as family, however dysfunctional we are, we are one here, all looking out for each other. 

This photo my friend Lareesa took. Seeing all the lights in the background and the single light here is just such an incredible picture. CCU is just such an incredible place, and I love and care for these people so much. This place is seriously impacting so many people here, that will go on and impact other people. This is the power of the family of Christ. 

Redefining the Sabbath

So something which has been really on my mind recently is how we view the Sabbath. I don't know about you but I was always brought up with the idea that in order to keep the Sabbath we would have to all sit around on a Sunday and do nothing, because we couldn't do any form of work or anything which would strain ourselves.
            The Sabbath as a concept totally makes sense, that we should take one day to just get our focus back on God and spend time with Him. That is the essence of the Sabbath. Again, experience or people may tell you that in order to do this, you have to read your Bible all day or fast, and these are great ideas but we can be so creative in how we connect with God. A way in which I really connect with God is through writing, so blogging is the ultimate form of connection or worship to God. You may be the same, or maybe you might prefer to write music or play your instrument all day, maybe you would love to throw yourself into an art piece, maybe you just would love to go on a long walk and just pray and talk to God whilst viewing his incredible creation, there are so many ways we can connect with God that the possibilities are limitless. BE CREATIVE. God loves creativity, after all He is the ultimate creator of it.
             I want to challenge you to honor the Sabbath. To take one day where you spend a significant amount of time just seeking God. An important thing I have learned recently is that God loves us just as much in the state of "being" than in the state of "doing". John Sawyer once used the analogy that everyday god sits in a big chair with a cup of tea, waiting for you to pop in the chair opposite and just really come to Him, tell Him all about your life. It hurts whenever you just jump in the chair for two minutes and then are away again. Spend time to come to your Savior and find refuge in Him. You are a servant of God, yes, and we should serve. But you are also a child of God, take the time to sit down with your Father and connect with Him, listening for his voice, do this in whatever manner proves most effective. I can guarantee you'll feel revitalized and God will reveal more to you than you could ever have guessed.

My Sawyer Retreat.

I was going to call this post my Sawyer Sabbatical because I am a big fan of alliteration but I settled on retreat because I feel that "retreat" is better at showing what I want to talk about. Last Friday I set off for Lexington for Labor day weekend, it was also my best friend Corinne's birthday and my friend Mark and I really wanted to spend it with her since all us Northern Irish are this side of the pond now. I was exhausted; physically, emotionally and spiritually. I was carrying the world on my shoulders and was drained beyond belief. Even to the point that Mark turned round to me on the drive down and said "Vikki...You look terrible", obviously in his compassionate and diplomatic self :) I had stayed at the Sawyers before and somehow before I went down there each time, I was exhausted, drained.
                     I got into the house of John and Brenda Sawyer late that night and immediately felt at home. The Sawyers house is one of the most welcoming homes I have been in and to walk into a place 4000 miles from your actual house and feel so at home is something which rarely happens. But the reasoning behind why I felt so at home was not simply because of how the house is decorated. I can honestly tell you that I look up to this couple so much. They constantly pour themselves into the community around them, the church and wider community also. I have worked alongside John and Brenda in Northern Ireland where they have been leading mission trips for many years. The impact they have 4000 miles away is nothing short of inspiring.
                     We have come to know John and Brenda as "Mama and Papa Sawyer", these people have children all over the world because of the love they show to people.Being around this couple just regenerates me beyond belief. Staying with them and their daughter Rachel just gave me insight into a godly family unit. Not only are they so engaged in the ministry around them, they show the power of having a ministry within your home and the effects it can bring about. I can honestly tell you that after my weekend with the Sawyers I came back to school totally revitalized and just overwhelmed by the fact that people I was connected to through Christ had such a genuine care and concern for me. This is something which just overwhelms me so much sometimes, that we have all these connections to people all over the world, and in this we can have a deep bond and love which is all rooted in Christ. John and Brenda are such examples to me in so many ways, they represent a Godly relationship, ultimate servants, loyal Christians among many other things which I hope to be someday. They inspire me to be the person I want to be, to strive for the best all in the name of Christ.
                      John and Brenda teach me that ministry is everywhere. Ministry happens when you take people into your home or when you take them out to eat. Ministry is not just in words but in cooking someone a meal or just sitting down over a cup of tea. Jesus isn't just saved for the pulpit, He's in everything and you can present Him in so many different ways, just make sure you present the same Jesus each time.

My Beautiful best friend Corinne who turned 20, without her I can honestly tell you I would be a crazy person. Blessed to call her my best friend and sister in Christ <3

The wonderful John and Brenda Sawyer, inspirations to many and great examples to follow :)